Personal Hygene thing because I don't feel like doing the starter in the actual post shush

[armoredsoul]

[Al wasn't quite sure how his life had come to this. There had been plenty of strange twists and turns that it took over the years, but this one...it really topped it, for some reason.]

[The kiddie pool is filled and waiting, with a basket of soaps, shampoo, and a few scrubbing implements nearby. The stack of towels is set even farther away to avoid the liberal splashing that is bound to happen here. Now all that remains is to get Wrath into the damn thing.]

Come on, Wrath, you really need to get cleaned up. People can actually smell you coming.

Comments

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Wrath is standing a good ten feet from the kiddie pool and refusing to come any closer. By some miracle, he actually had managed to be coaxed into a set of swim trunks... but his cooperation promptly ended there.]

[He folds his arms and gives the sparkling water a long, suspicious stare.]</sub>

This is a trick.

You're tricking me.

[armoredsoul]

[Al sighs and shakes his head.]

I'm not tricking you. I just want to help you get clean, that's all.

[garbagechild]

I AM clean. Mama licks my face every morning.

_{[... That... KIND of counts.]}

[armoredsoul]

And what about the rest of you? Never mind the fact I'm pretty sure your hair would be twice as long if we managed to de-tangle it.

[They can approach the idea of 'haircuts' later.]

Look, it'll take maybe a half hour at most and afterward we can play and just have fun with the water. I'll even let you spray me with the hose if you want.

[garbagechild]

My hair is FINE! She licks that, too.

<sub>[But her tongue is not a hairbrush, so no. It's not fine. Wrath's hair is horrifying.]

[But Al's offer gives the boy pause.]</sub>

... Can I spray you with the hose now?

[armoredsoul]

[Al eyes Wrath for a moment, then sighs and shakes his head.]

Just once. And there might be some cake after getting clean if you don't cause too much trouble...

[Hint, hint, kiddo.]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[... HM! Cake? Or satisfaction?]

[This is an important decision.]

[... Okay, he's made his choice.]

[He holds out his hand and says, with surprising gravitas:]</sub>

Give me the hose.

[armoredsoul]

[This is absolutely going to end well and not injure him somehow, right?]

[Al picks up the hose and hands it over, already regretting agreeing to this.]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Well... hopefully not injure him... but no guarantees are going to be made.]

[Wrath takes the hose, holds it up, and wastes absolutely no time whatsoever in spraying Al right in the face. Hard.]</sub>

[armoredsoul]

ACKPTH!!!

[Al flails and tries to block most of the spray with his hands, but DAMN did that smart!]

Ow! Okay, that's enough!

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Guess what Wrath is NOT doing?]

[Stopping.]

[Wrath is not stopping.]

[He is, however, cackling like a horrible younger version of Envy.]</sub>

[armoredsoul]

[GODOMMOT WROTH]

[Al puts up with it for a few more seconds before he half-charges Wrath to get the hose back from him.]

Wra--pbbbth, damnit--WRATH!

[garbagechild]

_{[Hooting and hollering, Wrath prances away with the hose, continuing to squirt Al with it whenever he has the chance. He's at least spared getting nailed straight in the face with it, though. Sort of hard to do that when you're trying to run away.]}

[armoredsoul]

[With the lack of direct-face-sprayage, Al's able to run a lot faster, and starts to gain on Wrath. He's laughing despite himself, mostly from how ridiculous this is.]

Get back here!

[garbagechild]

_{[Wrath obviously can't straight-up outrun Al when he's still holding onto the hose-- so he resorts to ducking and dodging, dancing circles around the older boy like a goddamn weasel.]}

No!

[armoredsoul]

[That works for a while, but Al's pretty nimble himself, and finally he gets close enough to make a running lunge to grab onto Wrath, which will probably send the pair of them sprawling through the grass.]

Gotcha!

[garbagechild]

<sub>[MAN DOWN MAN DOWN]

[Wrath (and the hose) hit the grass in a tangle of limbs and green rubber. He yelps, but more on principal than in pain, and twists around in Al's grasp to try and aim a jet of cold water directly down the other boy's back.]</sub>

Take that!

[armoredsoul]

ACK!

[COLD COLD COLD!! Al squirms and scrambles to get a hold of the hose to turn it back on Wrath--fair play, man!]

[garbagechild]

_{[The little monster lets out an honest-to-goodness squeal and flails wildly as the hose is turned on him.]}

AHH! AAAH! AGHBLBLLPHLPTH!

[armoredsoul]

[Al sprays Wrath a bit more for good measure before he turns it away and gets to his feet, holding out a hand for Wrath.]

Okay, let's get this thing done now. You promised.

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Wrath wheezes, looking slowly up at the older boy.]

[And then a terrible grin spreads across his face.]</sub>

No, I didn't.

_[8)]

[armoredsoul]

[.......................]

[Yeah, Al's just gonna spray him again.]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[He would screech again but he's too busy cackling maniacally and wiggling out from underneath Alphonse like a greased pig. He's hard to hang onto even under normal circumstances, and he's even HARDER to hang onto when he's just been soaked with a hose.]

[There he goes, scampering off again. At least this time AL has the hose.]</sub>

[armoredsoul]

Oh, no, you don't!

[Al takes off after Wrath, doing his best to keep that spray on him. But when the pursuer is on a 'leash' and the pursued isn't...]

Get back here, you little brat!

[garbagechild]

Never!

You'll have to catch me!

_{[Now it's a game, though. They've turned it into a game. Which, aside from making things a slightly bigger challenge, is good news for Al.]}

Catch me, catch me, catch me!

_{[He leaps over one of the chairs by the pool and runs circles around some shrubs.]}

[armoredsoul]

[Al grins and yanks the slack of the hose closer before running after Wrath--the length of the hose keeps him to only one half of the yard, but by angling the spray he's still able to keep a bead on Wrath and tries to use that to herd him back to Al's zone of movement.]

You can't escape me!

[garbagechild]

Yes I can! I can escape ANYTHING!

<sub>[He'd escaped the Gate, after all!]

[But he's also a harebrained little goblin who's not particuarly great at thinking ahead, so Al is able to successfully herd him back into range.]</sub>

[armoredsoul]

[Al grins and runs at Wrath to cut off his escape, spraying him as he does.]

No you won't!

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Wrath shrieks and throws his arms over his face to shield himself from the spray, aaaaand... in doing so just might wind up running directly into Al's path.]

[HE SHOULD NEVER HAVE LET AL HAVE THAT HOSE BACK.]</sub>

[armoredsoul]

[This entire day can just be summed up as 'MISTAKES WERE MADE', lbr.]

[Al cackles and tackles Wrath to the ground, scrubbing his head in a half-noogie while he gets water pretty liberally sprayed all over both of them. While he's not quite pinning Wrath down, he's also definitely not letting him squirm free this time.]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Aaaand down they go again, Wrath making a noise somewhere between a scream and a peal of laughter as his hair gets mushed and the water gets all over both of them again.]

[He's already trying to get back on his feet again, but this time Al has a solid hold on him.]</sub>

Noooo!

Let go!

[armoredsoul]

Nope! Not ever!

[Al wrestles with Wrath a bit before managing to get his arms around the boy's middle and...well, he attempts to roll them over and get to his feet, but it's a little hard to manage.]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[For all his struggling, Wrath weighs barely anything. He thrashes and growls, but now that Al's actually got a hold on him, it's not much trouble to haul him up off the lawn.]

[He kicks his legs.]</sub>

Aaaaaaa!

[armoredsoul]

[Nope, you're stuck with him! And Al starts marching them both over to the kiddie pool, laughing all the while.]

I win!

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Now that he's been officially captured, the reality that he will soon be subjected to A BATH is starting to sink in. But unlike back 'home', he's no powerhouse. What was once a metric ton of coiled strength wrapped up in a pint-sized body that could, coincidentally, also perform horrific element-altering SCIENCE MAGIC is now quite literally nothing but a little boy.]

[So for all his flailing and shouting... Al is able to dump him in the pool.]</sub>

NOOOOOOO!